THE TWELVE PUBS OF CHRISTMAS

Japan has affirmed certain cultural stereotypes for me, one of which is that the Irish are always good for a good time.  Last weekend Paul (who is Irish) organized a pub crawl in Osaka titled "The Twelve Pubs of Christmas."  What followed was one of the most magical and memorable evenings of my life.  Between the hours of 6pm and 4am, we visited 12 "establishments."  [One "pub" was actually on the subway, and we all stood quietly sipping our beverages as our fellow Japanese passengers smiled at us with genuine good cheer and took sneaky photos.]

The fourth pub of Christmas

T'was also a night of Christmas competition.  Homemade Christmas jumpers (that's sweaters in Commonwealth English) were encouraged, and we kept a running tally of which one various bartenders/clerks/obliging passerby judged to be his or her favorite.  The contenders were impressive: some lit up, there was an arm wrestling Santa/snow man, two Christmas trees, hand-stitched bells, and a Santa face.  I wore an actual Santa suit, beard and all, and carried around a sack of "toys" for good girls and boys (whoever was the first to finish their drink that round).  Finally, we distributed stick-on bows for people to place on unsuspecting strangers.  The clear winner was a silver bow placed on the posterior of a girl who was outrageously drunk at 8pm. 

The sixth pub of Christmas

These were the twelve Christmas miracles of the evening:

1. No one died.  

2. No one got arrested.

3. No one got sick.

4. No one exposed themselves.

5. Everyone stuck together.  

6. Everyone made it home.

7. Everyone made it home either alone or with the person with whom they began the evening.

8. Everyone remembers what happened the night before (this may be the greatest miracle of all).

9. Everyone remained jolly.

10. While lustily singing "Angels We Have Heard on High" in an Osaka subway station, a highly inebriated Japanese woman heard us and joined in, words and all. 

11.  As we exited the 8th pub of Christmas (a local convenience store), it started snowing.

12. The twelfth pub of Christmas, though it had been closed for half an hour, still let us in for a quick, final drink.  However, had they turned us away, our tale would have had taken on Biblical parallels.

We came away from the night with a multitude of great stories, but my favorite involved two little Japanese girls on the subway, who were shocked to encounter a gaijin in a Santa suit.  They were clearly confused, but became very animated when they saw I wanted to speak to them, and their mothers were beside themselves with delight.  However, the jig was soon up: the youngest quickly pointed out, "You're not Santa!"  To which I had no response, but to chuckle heartily.  LAL gave them stickers (she's so thoughtful), and they gave us all high fives in return.  Go go Christmas magic!